Time to give up weed

[Cath]

Hi i've never written on a forum before, i came cross this page after a google search and i think i'm in the right place.

My story is not unusual, i am addicted to marijuana, i have been for 16 years. I have no problem admitting that at all, I don't want to be addicted to it. Sometimes i hate it, but most of the time i love it.

I am 29 years of age and I have recently got married, my husband only smokes occasionally, i smoke every day. I don't have a problem with day to day life, i'm not depressed, (although i have suffered with depression in the past) I can cope perfectly well when i have had a joint. I am currently a first year at university, and smoking does not effect my study. In fact i think that i perform most tasks better when i am high.I have kept my addiction a secret from my family, and a lot of my friends.


I realise that all that i have said so far is classic addiction talk. I rationalise my addiction and make it so that it isn't a problem, but it is a problem, a very big problem.

I spend ALL my money on it and i'm ashamed to say that i put weed before anything else, sometimes even my marriage. We do not have children, We have been trying to conceive for nearly three years, i KNOW that i will increase my chances immensely by quitting the weed, but i can't



I have been to my doctor and told them how severe my addiction is, (I smoke around 10 strong joints a night) I was told that there is not really much that is available to me as marijuana is not considered a real addiction.
I have tried cold turkey, i have tried cutting down. All ending in pathetic failure. There was always a reason why i gave in easily.

The best attempt that i have achieved is 12 days. I REALLY want to quit but i have zero will power. My husband is really supportive, and maybe gives in to me a little too easily, because he loves me. But i abuse this love to get more weed. I am ashamed of myself.

I am going to attempt again, and use this site to help me, I am glad of any support, it will be nice to know that others are going through it with me. I have been reading some recent posts, and i wanted to say to everybody who has given up or who is trying to give up, WELL DONE i hope that i can achieve what you people have


Any advice you have will be appreciated, It gives me hope thank you

[BFB]

Hi Cath and welcome to the forum.

Well done on your decision to quit, I am sure you will feel the benefit in the long term, even if you are not feeling any cognitive or health problems yet, it doesn’t mean that you won’t later, I was fine for a good number of years, but they did hit me later on and when they did they hit me hard. I am not saying this will definitely be the case for you but it does happen to a great deal many of us and prevention is always the best cure. It sounds like you will save a fair amount of money if nothing else and will no longer be a slave to addiction, like you say when you are addicted you do tend to put it before everything else, which can be a significant problem in its self. I know what you mean about marijuana not been considered a problem in certain cultures, my parents tried to get medical advice about my habit early on, but didn’t really get much help or support, here in the UK we are still only just waking up to just how habit forming marijuana can be for some and the problems it can cause, but you just have to read the other posts on this forum to realise that something is going on at least for some of us and that you truly are not alone, so don’t despair we are all, or have at one point been in the same boat and are with you every step of the way. You really have one of two options, you can either go cold turkey or gradually wean yourself off, I know you haven’t had much success so far, but one out of the two probably suits you better and which of these two it is can be different for everyone, but it has to be one or the other, so how you respond to either approach is something you will have to find out, very often you just have to suck it and see and sometimes it can take us a number of times to get there whichever way that happens to be. Check out our how to quit marijuana – tips and advice post , there may be some information there that will also help. Anyway think positive I am sure you can do it, read the other experiences here, like I say you are not alone and we are with you all the way.

Take care and please keep us posted.

[mungobeans]

Hi Cath. Your story sounds SO familiar to me, everthing you have said was me. I finally gave up new years day for me and not family friends or health reasons. All i can really say is that you CAN do it and life after cannabis is exactly the same as it was before. All those times you think that maybe a coffee or drink or whatever you do won't feel the same without a joint between your fingers is crap. I was a heavy smoker for 20yrs and am now 34 days without. The 1st few days are a nightmare but once you can start counting the days without that in itself became quite addictive, 1 day leads to 2 days leads to 5 etc...... I know that sounds to easy but i'm sure you can do it if you really want. Plus the extra cash in your pocket is a real bonus.
Now I'm nothin special just a guy who has had enough of weed ruling my life and now realise that it's me who calls the shots and not the green.
So be strong and take each day as it comes that's all I can say and I wish you all the luck and strength that I found.
Warmest regards, Adam

[Cath]

Thank you for your kind words of support Adam, I really appreciate them.

Well done to you for having 34 days of sobriety, you are doing fantastic.

I feel really positive about what I am going to do. Today i have got rid of my paraphernalia and deleted my dealers number from my phone. I have told my husband that he is not to give in to me, and I have started to write a diary of why I want to quit and my feelings, and I am well stocked up on Green Tea as I have read that it will help.

Tomorrow will be the first real test for me but I am determined to achieve this. I have never had the determination that i feel I have right now.

I will keep posting how I feel, and how I am doing
Thanks again
Cath

[Hummer]

from my experience,

I smoked for 10 years, a lot of really strong joints each night... spending all my money and time on weed.

I tried to quit numerous times over the last couple of years, all half-arsed attempts without any conviction - i guess this time i was just ready to quit. and this forum as been one of the main differences, maybe it can be for you too?

I found cold-turkey the only option.

I smoked some cigs when i was really desperate. when i couldnt sleep at night i would just put my ipod on and listen to some relaxing music.

you'll probably have some crazy dreams, but they'll stop after a week or two

also if you find yourself sweaty and uncomfortable a lot then this is also only temporary and will pass within 2 weeks in my experience

I like to think that each day without weed is getting better and easier, if i go back to getting stoned then i'll have to go through all this hassle of quitting some other time

sometimes i get the thought like 'i'd love a joint right now' but i have to just block it out


in the really hard part at the start of quitting i kept asking myself: "do i want to be stoned forever?" no. "will i let weed beat me?" no.

you can do it!

[mungobeans]

Hi Cath, how are you doing?

[Cath]

Well it's day one for me.

I think I'm coping, I'm keeping busy. I have to be honest, twice tonight I have thought about going to my dealer and starting to quit tomorrow. I nearly talked myself into it. But I never went.

I am going to have a bath and read a book and try to relax. I'm feeling really tense. I keep telling myself, I'm going to do this do this, I'm going to be better off for it. I just want to get through today. I'm not thinking about tomorrow yet.

I agree with everything that you said Hummer, I have had too many half arsed attempts, But I am going to use this site to help me this time. I Feel like I'm not alone. Like there are people here who have been where I am and I'm taking your advice and trying to block out the thoughts of giving in.

Thanks for the warning about the dreams and the uncomfortable sweats, I'll be ready for them. Thank you for the advice and WELL DONE on your achievement.

Well Im going now, I'll keep posting, and any more advice or support will be appreciated.

Thank you people

[BFB]

We have all been there Cath, we have all struggled with the I will quit tomorrow demon, but like the old saying goes “tomorrow never comes”, tomorrow will never be now, it will always be the future and if you keep going on like that it means the time when you will quit will never come, the best time to begin giving up is always now, you are going to have to do it at some point if you truly want it to happen, so you may as well make it now and get it out the way. So well done on not caving in, that took real strength.

Baths are a God send they really do help you to relax in a healthy natural way, like you say don’t think about tomorrow, now that you have started just take it one day at a time. And before you know it the time will pass, it’s been four and a half years for me now.

Anyway I think you are doing really well, stay strong, you can do it!

[Hummer]

good advice blogger, it has to be taken one-day at a time.

also cath, i forgot to say that I found that in the first two weeks after I quit I felt a sharp rise in my levels of paranoia - like really bad paranoia (God knows why this happened and I don't know if it's common in everyone) so just be aware that if your experience this it also is only a temporary part of the withdrawl

all i can say is i hope you do it, because i cannot believe how good i am feeling at the moment - it's only know I can truely see how much damage weed was having on my brain, personality and emotions

[Cath]

Thanks for all the advice.

I am feeling really positive today, I have thought about smoking a lot but I'm managing to block it out. I think I have just passed a big test for me, one of my old friends rang me before to tell me he has some really nice smoke if I wanted any. I told him No I had quit. He laughed and said well I'll come round with this now and make you a joint, I told him under no circumstances is he to come to my house and I also old him to not ring me with any again. I feel quite proud of myself.

I had some strange dreams last night, and had a really restless night. But again, I'm taking the positive from that and thinking well at least I am tired and I will sleep better tonight.

On the whole today has been a good day, I am going to watch a movie now and have an early night. I hope tomorrow turns out to be as easy, I'll keep you all posted.